there i go again...

abandoned my blog like frigging again and gonna give excuses that i am busy and blah blah blah... i guess the truth is i had somehow lost my passion for blogging, from having 1 or 2 post per day to 1 or 2 post per week and now 1 or 2 post per month, next 1 or 2 post per year? or perhaps i had lost my inspirations as my life is getting kinda dull, is the same damn routine everyday like i am some programmed robot... i just finished my finals and the same worries remain on my mind everytime after my finals, the question whether am i going to pass this time and the anticipation for result day... anyway few days as i was busy studying on a late night for the next day paper, suddenly a friend of mine from alpha came to chat with me on msn... then he send me some links to my blog and i was curious so i clicked it and it was the posts on my 1 year life in malacca during my alpha year... as i read through my post, only to realise that another year had passed and it hits me pretty badly, a sudden emotion rush... i realised that i really miss the moments i had in malacca, those memories i had with my close friendS <-- (note that its not 1 or 2 but its alot back then, hahahaha...) damn you mmu, why do you have to separate us? alpha year was one of the best years i had in my life and unlike my beta year here in cyberjaya, too much of jealousy, backstabbing and drama... then i had a flashback of my 1st year here in cyberjaya, i said to myself, hey it aint half bad... although now i might not have that much friends compare to back then but hey its a big city, people just turn calculative and materialistic with the cold barrier and they are accustomed with their own groups, so thats the fact about life and i dont care how many friends i do have cause i know who are my real true friends are, people that understand you with honesty without judging you when you needed them to be and supports you when you can rely on them... i really dont need people that cant understands me, that judges me, backstabs me and if so the friendship is that fragile, then we are just not meant to have and i just dont care... i just have a strong personality, the type that either you gonna love it or you gonna hate it and i dont want to fake myself just because i want to suit in to a group and the truth is people just gonna talk but it aint gonna affect me... popularity means nothing to me, groups are just like vultures and what i believe in, is just to be who i am... but of course, that means nothing with your true friends... my 1 year had filled with alot of fun, definitely bonded with few buddies, go through the moments together, surviving this cyber-dessert-jaya... i do believe my years ahead, i will grow strong and and live life to the max... hehe... Love, B...